Both my parents think that i have anger problems. I have trouble with controlling my emotions especially when it come to handelling stress.
I’m 13 and they think that i should consider councilling or calling kids help line.Although i really don’t think this is going to help. They dont see that its them that makes me really angry.They don’t see how caged in i feel in this house.We always have massive arguments about this that last weeks.These fights always end up with me throwing things at them. I cant help doing this, its just a way to get my anger out.
I hate it as it happens almost everyday. Everyday i’m always crying and i’m not even allowed to go out and take a walk to get it all out of me. My parents are WAY overprotective and i feel as if theyre always taking my sisters sides and that they love them more than me.
My anger problems are ruining the realtionship between us, but its something i cant control. I don’t belive that counciling will not help. Is there any suggestions?
It’s too bad you have no self-control, because you will end up in a mental hospital or prison if you keep having tiraids. I would say you need to get a jounal and everyday write in it at least one thing you can be thankful for. You won’t have your parents forever and you will miss them when they are gone. Right now you can be thankful that they are providing a place for you to live, with clothes to wear and food to eat. Don’t take everything for granted. It cost a lot of money to have a home. Be part of your family, help out around the house. Don’t make your mother have to carry your load too! Maybe you are hanging around with the wrong crowd, listening to others gripe about their parents. You need to find a Church with a good youth group and get involved. God put you in the home you are in for a reason. Get to know his son Jesus and find out why you are here, he has a plan for your life. Try Him.
i’m confused, and unsure of how to rid my anger problems. Can anyone help me?
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November 27th, 2009 at 4:45 am
By suggesting councelling to you, your parents really are trying to do what they can. The things that you’ve said here tells me that you feel unhappy inside…and it honestly sounds like more going on than teenage hormones. I personally feel that seeing a councellor is a wonderful idea! this is a person that would be totally on your side, and help give you ideas to cope with your family and with your angry outbursts. You sound like you want to change, so please consider doing something about it now
Everyone just wants to see you as happy and care-free as you can be during your teenage years 
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November 27th, 2009 at 5:00 am
It’s too bad you have no self-control, because you will end up in a mental hospital or prison if you keep having tiraids. I would say you need to get a jounal and everyday write in it at least one thing you can be thankful for. You won’t have your parents forever and you will miss them when they are gone. Right now you can be thankful that they are providing a place for you to live, with clothes to wear and food to eat. Don’t take everything for granted. It cost a lot of money to have a home. Be part of your family, help out around the house. Don’t make your mother have to carry your load too! Maybe you are hanging around with the wrong crowd, listening to others gripe about their parents. You need to find a Church with a good youth group and get involved. God put you in the home you are in for a reason. Get to know his son Jesus and find out why you are here, he has a plan for your life. Try Him.
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November 27th, 2009 at 5:46 am
Sweetie, 13 is such a difficult age. And I have a 13 year old so I know. I would suggest what my 13 year old does – she talks to me and listens to what I say. I don’t let her out that often also but she always asks me to go walking with her to the park and we just talk. She tells her friends to hang out in our house so I can meet them and I let them be in her room. If you find yourself angry most of the time – sweetie, you’re only hurting yourself. Try to calm down, breathe deep breaths when you feel your anger coming on or take a bath, it works wonders. Maybe your parents are just scared something bad might happen to you if you’re out too often. Maybe talk to your mom first when things are sober and calm, discuss it with her without getting angry at her. I;ll pray for you.
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November 27th, 2009 at 6:08 am
I know it does not sound like it,but counseling will help.What you are describing sounds like a bipolar disorder.My ex husband had it,and it went undiagnosed for many years.It was not until he attempted suicide and I had him legally committed that it got diagnosed.Now,with the proper medications,he is a decent guy…….even if he is my ex.Another thing to do that will help is to cut down on your sugar intake and red food dyes.When cutting down on the food dyes,be sure to watch the hot dogs and bologne……they are both high in content of dye,but rarely listed.Also,switch what soda you drink.Most have a fructose base.If you have it in your area,switch to Jones soda.It is more of a natural sweetened base.If you do decide to do the counseling thing,ask your parents to be active in it with you.Your anger is not just your problem or theirs,it is everyone involved’s problem.A counselor can show both you and your parents how to communicate with one another in a form that is non agressive,but productive.
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November 27th, 2009 at 6:43 am
Parents are stupid, they don’t know anything and they always favor your siblings. Sounds like you have a big case of poor me, somebody feel sorry for me. Maybe if you tried to talk ( not yell) things out with them it might help. Maybe if you explain how you feel to them they would see your side. Are your sisters older and is that why they are allowed to do things you can’t. If you are acting like a 5 year old having tantrums then why should they let you have privileges. If they are over protective it is because they love and worry about you. Believe it or not your mom and dad were your age once to. You can control anything you want if you try. I think you may be a bit spoiled and still resorting to tantrums tends to prove that.
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November 27th, 2009 at 7:27 am
it may sound a little weird especially to someone who has never actually researched the topic but try meditation. you can look up different techniques and stuff online if you like and if you keep to it and try and progress in it you will feel and improvement with personal control. it also helps relieve a lot of stress and can calm you which has numerous health benefits not including mental and social benefits.
Give it a try at least and if you keep to it you will improve in at least a good amount of ways
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November 27th, 2009 at 8:01 am
Read this book
http://www.ronitbaras.com
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November 27th, 2009 at 8:11 am
For one, you are at the age where your hormones are out of control, and raging throughout your body. You are not alone, as many teens go through this. This is part of growing up. Be glad that you do have such strong emotion. What you have to do now, as you journey down the road to adulthood and maturity, is learn how to deal with yourself, and to use things in a positive manner. You need to recognize (which you seem to already be doing) your problem, and figure out a healthy way to express yourself.
Is what your getting upset and angry about really all that important? Is the situation at hand equal to your behavior? I mean, if you spilled your milk on the floor should you be beaten? Don’t over exaggerate the issue….
When you start to get out of control, remove yourself from the situation, take a deep breath, and try to realize that whatever it is, it’s not the end of the world, and it’s not worth all the energy your wasting on it.
Think about how you would feel if during one of the fits of anger, you threw something and actually hurt one of your family members, or whom ever it is you’re around at the time? You would feel like crap. They don’t deserve that.
Think about how you would feel if your parents, or someone else in the household acted like you, always angry, on the verge of expolding, making everyone walk around on eggshells- if you will, causing an uncomfortable feeling throughout the entire house…..not so good.
Think about what you look like during these fits….what if you were standing in front of a mirror, looking at yourself while you scream and throw things….you might actually look like a 2 yr old throwing a temper tantrum….
You have to make a conscious effort to change; and if you are stronger than your emotions, hormones, and everyone else, you will do it.
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November 27th, 2009 at 8:16 am
Anger is an emotion like all others, you need to deal with it in a constructive way, getting angry and trowing things does not give you your parents respect, it only proves that you are still a child and need to be treated as such.
You are thirteen years old, and before I suggest something let me tell you what I think, if you were my child I would think you are sleep deprived, do you go to bed very late? I have seen such a change of personality in sleep deprived people especially a child, think about it and if you think it fits try to have a few early nights to bed, things will look totally different.
We all get angry, the secret is to deal with it in a constructive way, you can try getting your tennis racket or a stick and beat the shit out of your mattress, or trow a rug over the clothes lines and beat the hell out of it, you can also keep a journal and express your anger that way, write it all down, be as descriptive as you can be,( you never know the journal could became a best seller one day ) or you can go in the bush or forest and scream your head off,( this method is not always possible)
I am sure of one thing, screaming and trowing things at your parents will not encourage them to treat you as an adult , you will be treated like a child as long as you behave like a child, and you know just for the heck of it, I am going to say thirteen years old you are a child stop asking for the impossible, your parents do not love your sisters more, your sisters do not trow things at them do they?
PS I have re read your letter, I also suggest a trip to the doctor you could be suffering from bipolar disorder
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