Anger Problems ?

My wife left me to her brother house for a month because I was temper and went to Anger Management and need seroius help how to bring my wife back home for 1 month that she not been in my home for a month that I was alone in my home for a month missed my wife and children.

I usually don’t recommend books because I hate it when people recommend them to me, but I honestly wish I could buy "Love & Respect" for every married (and engaged) person I know. So try and hear me out…

It states that a woman’s driving need is to feel loved and when she feels loved she feels happy. A man’s driving need is to feel respect and when he feels respected he is happy. When a woman feels unloved she acts out disrespectfully to her husband, and when a man feels disrespected he acts out unloving towards his wife and the crazy cycle begins.

If this is setting off any light bulbs for you read on…

"I wrote this book out of desperation that was turned into inspiration. As a pastor, I counseled married couples and could not solve their problems. The major problem I heard from wives was, "He doesn’t love me." Wives are made to love, want to love, and expect love. Many husbands fail to deliver. But as I kept studying Scripture and counseling couples, I finally saw the other half of the equation. Husbands weren’t saying it much, but they were thinking, "She doesn’t respect me." Husbands are made to be respected, want respect, and expect respect. Many wives fail to deliver. The result is that five out of ten marriages land in divorce court (and that includes evangelical Christians).

As I wrestled with the problem, I finally saw a connection: without love from him, she reacts without respect; without respect from her, he reacts without love. Around and around it goes. I call it the Crazy Cycle – marital craziness that has thousands of couples in its grip."

I am not even half-ways through the book and workbook, and while my husband is not studying the material with me it has already worked miracles in my no-longer-failing marriage.

If you do believe in God I highly recommend this biblically based book. It’s not a "religious freak" book or anything but it’s nice to know that it is based on things in the bible and not just some theory or pop psychology book, and it’s been a #1 seller for over 2 years now… it’s working for thousands of couples!

My extreme anger management problems, my verbal abuse against my boyfriend, and my new religious preoccupations (conversion to Islam and adoption of full hijab, a decision i am very happy with) has caused my family to accuse me of being bipolar. My sister said, ‘you are doing this because we grew up in an abusive home. I wasn’t always around, I don’t know what happened to you, but you are only choosing this religion b/c you have issues with your body.’
My mom recently divorced my stepfather. She will not tell my all the reasons why.
I have ALWAYS had the memory of a man on his knees holding his sexual organ in front of a toilet, beckoning me to come closer. I cannot see his face in the memory and that is all i remember.
Religion apart, do you think something happened to me that is causing these bipolar symptoms? It is so taboo and I am scared to ask my mom if i was molested. But I need to know because I am scared to have kids because i tell my bf I think he will molest my kids

I don’t know much about repressed memory, it is a controversial subject.

I would however comment that a severe psychological upset can cause post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). A very common symptom of the disorder is flashbacks. The disorder includes an altered levels of adrenaline and/or cortisol, which can cause symptoms which are often seen in bi-polar disorder.

(I’m sure you appreciate that elevated adrenaline results in ‘anger’)

"I am scared to ask my mom if i was molested"
avoidance of related matters is a symptom of PTSD.

"need to know because I am scared to have kids because i tell my bf I think he will molest my kids"
You may well be correctly suspicious/hypervigilent, but irrational thoughts are also symptoms of PTSD/depression.

There’s also a condition called Complex PTSD, which I think your sister might have been referring to ("we grew up in an abusive home")
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complex_post-traumatic_stress_disorder

I think you should see your doctor.

Ax
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Walking, running, exercising, writing, talking, drawing, counting…
They don’t work too well for me. I need something more. Some good ideas. My mother-in-law is crazy and I just can’t deal with it anymore. But I can’t do anything about it so I get even more angry and it just builds and builds. It has no where to go. How can I release my anger in an easy, socially excepted way?
***I have a kick boxing bag. I live downstairs. So when I use it, she can hear me and gets all snippy.***

Screaming, primal screaming. Wait until the house is empty and you’re still angry and just let all the anger out. Find some kind of inanimate object that "you" own and that you cannot damage and beat the crap out of it, yell, scream, vent your emotions out-load. Get crazy with it and just accept it and have fun with it. Try to avoid hitting the walls and doors though. Enjoy how good it feels just to let go of all that anger, pretend like she is there and that you are yelling at her by use of the thin air around you. It feels sooo good. You’ll feel like a new man afterwards. Feel yourself releasing everything that is built up inside of you. After a few times, you’ll get really good at it and will learn to control it better.

Then afterwards, if your up to it, confront her in real life. You’ll feel calm enough to talk to her more openly, and more calmly, about what is bothering you and it will make it easier to get your point across in a more mature, stronger voice. You’ll know better what to say and how to put it into the proper context.

I am such an angry person and I don’t know why. I try not to be, but it’s second nature to me. Nothing major has happened in my life to cause this problem. I was a shy person through my childhood & teenage years though.

There is an excellent book "When Anger Hurts" that has many practical ways to learn to understand and control your anger. Give it a look.

Anger many times is a cover for other emotions, especially fear and shame. Anger makes us feel strong and capable at the time, but the aftermath can be pretty horrible.

Good luck, and i hope you find a way to get it in check